On Dating and Deception

Recently I tried to have another go at working with dating services. Since then I’ve managed to tie myself up in knots, I loathe liars so much 🙁 This story goes way back. In the last 6-7 years my area of expertise as a psychotherapist has been established of its own accord – I “marry off” / “solve problems with a partner.” It happened on its own and, after having worked with a lot of clients and couples, I’ve formed some comprehensive concept describing most of the phenomena associated with the partnership. Its – the concept’s – adequacy is confirmed by the effectiveness of my work with clients in this field. And about half a year ago I’ve had an odd experience. My colleagues and I have developed a working prototype of a superstructure on our technology, which allows you to find a match. I’ve invested in this algorithm everything I knew about the dynamics of the relationships. We “ran” the algorithm on available pairs. Its expected effectiveness was an order of magnitude higher than in any existing solution. We’ve contacted a major dating-service. Told them the prospects. What naive fools we were! We only wanted to collaborate! The reply was: “We have no need in this.” We were slightly taken aback, “How so?”. Their answer killed us. “We do not need to effectively match people, our monetization does not depend on it. We make money out of blah blah blah. ” That’s it, they make money on some virtual postcards for prospective partners, on subscriptions with advanced functionality, etc. And they ABSOLUTELY are not intending to solve the problem of choosing a partner! We’ve asked to elaborate, “And what about a 30 minute test that users are asked to fill?”. The best joke was their answer: “The answers are not recorded anywhere, we offer random partners and randomly estimate 60 percent compatibility.” I hope they’ll burn in hell. And then a new round of searching for potential colleagues amongst dating services goes. And again with the same response from a completely different conversation partner. Perhaps there are dating-services somewhere that work differently, I do not know. But the fact that the declared service is not provided, even in such a non-specific sphere as relationships, is awful. I understand the importance of monetization. I am not against prepaid additional functionality. But the main problem is not being solved at all! And it’s not only anywhere in the priorities list, but also there’s no tools for solving it whatsoever. Top managers don’t even seem interested in talking on this topic. I’ve checked the figures at Online Dating Statistics. None of the services provides the percentage for married couples that met online. I think that’s because the numbers are lower than with casual acquaintances. Otherwise they would’ve shout from the rooftops something like “Our odds of getting married is N times higher!” There’s only one bright spot in this – now the situation can only improve:)